Skoto 71 17:35 PM
- Guardsman 3rd Class Jim Yitch
Not much to report today. Prisoners were mostly well behaved…except for Prisoner #11071974. His constant demands of information about the whereabouts of a certain princess, coupled with threats of burning the place to the ground with his “dragon fire” really start to grate on my nerves. Why do I always get stuck guarding this wing of the dungeon with all the crazies? I need a new job.
Skoto 72 16:55 PM
- Guardsman 3rd Class Jim Yitch
Here again. Once again, crazy man Phil, sorry, Prisoner #11071974 is back at it. Now, not only is he a “dragon,” he’s a “magic dragon.” Claims he can use magic to make things grow or shrink, and he’s going to make me the size of a mouse or some such nonsense.
In other news, Doug Gayhol got promoted to Guardsman Second Class today. Should have been me. Doug is such a brown-noser. Just because he doesn’t “fall asleep on the job,” or “come to work smelling of ale,” or “lose his keys and all the prisoners in his wing get loose.” I hate Doug.
Skoto 73 17:45 PM
- Guardsman Third Class Jim Yitch
Couldn’t find my keys this morning. Got to work and found Prisoner #11071974’s cell door open. Again. Jarl Faolin and Sir Gadaren were pretty pissed. Jarl Faolin had to send a couple of men to search for him. He was found at the local KFC. Makes sense. The food here is terrible, and King’s Rest Fried Creature has some of the best food in town!
Good news is, Prisoner #11071974 is back in his cell. They even let him keep his value meal. I advised that they take the spork away from him, but they said I had no right to say anything after I had let a prisoner escape. Besides, they said, what could he possibly do with a spork? Jerks! Not my fault he got ahold of my keys! I left them right next to my ale bottle…